To be a good scrapbooker you need to make time for the hobby. I can't seem to start a project like a scrapbook page and then come back to it later and it takes a good 45 minutes to an hour for me to put together a page (this number comes from research done at crops). I take my time and agonize over decisions, after all these are for posterity, my grandchildren's grandchildren may be looking at these things.
Instead I spend my time making cards and playing with my dog, hanging out with my kid, dinking around with Pinterest, reading crafty blogs, and if I am honest (head hung in shame) spending too much time playing King games like Candy Crush.
I am not a great photographer. I don't take a lot of pictures. I don't document each day. When there is an event I may take a photograph or two but I am often too busy enjoying the event to document it. I even got through two of my son's birthday parties without taking even one picture. The scrapper's shame.
I didn't grow up with a camera in my face. My ancestors didn't grow up with cameras in their faces either. The images of my dad and his family are precious because they are rare.
What is worth documenting
Three years ago today my father died. Today is his Angel Day. For the past three years life has not been something I generally wanted to document. My son and I have both had our battles with depression and loneliness. Grief takes time. Sometimes a lot of time. I get up every morning and walk the dog and get outside and have some time to pray and be grateful for today. I encourage gratitude in my son but a grieving 12 year old often has trouble with the concept.
The period between May 28th, my father's birthday, and June 23rd his death date are always hard. Father's Day is particularly difficult on my son as his father is not in the picture. PawPaw was his male role model, his everything.
Scrapbooking, like journalism, is the first draft of history. It is also incredibly biased as it is a history generally told from one perspective. It is not neutral, it is often not just factual like journalism, there is a lot of emotion on the page. Most scrapbook pages I see in magazines and on blogs show happy, smiling people who clearly care for one another.
Scrapping a moody, grieving tween is not easy. Even though the sun is shining and the world is whirling around us sometimes we only see the gray gloominess of our own thoughts. We see what is missing and not what is here. How do you scrapbook that?
The blog plan
When I rebooted the blog the last time I was overly ambitious. I didn't take into account the needs of a dog that shadows me everywhere. I didn't anticipate side work that would help pay the bills. I didn't write far enough ahead to make this the blog I wanted for you (and me).
I will try to put down the candy crush and pick up the camera more. I have a lot of cards I could share with you but they end up on instagram more often then this blog. To see cute cardness you can follow me there.
Tips, tricks and ideas will return here, it due time. But for today it's time to grieve with my boy.